Independance Day

All my life I have been a member of 'groups'. I have been a member of the group of men called homos. I have been a part of the groups of Asians living in America. I have been in the group called artists, the group of people called "inked" (tatto'd), the group called gym rats.... so many groups.

Today I joined another group; a smaller group. I became a member of the group of people who have told Tim: "I will no longer be able to enable you, to help you, to save you. Please go." The words were spoken with reason and the reason was warranted.

It hurts to tell someone you have loved to leave. It feels like a betrayal--not just to them but to yourself.

Until you remember that your first loyalty is to yourself, your spouse, your home, your safety, your peace of mind.

As the great Stephen Sondheim once observed: Every day a little death.

Like the Phoenix, though, out of death we can be reborn. And like a newborn, I am crying.

But like that newborn, the crying makes it possible for me to breathe...

Again.